\\SiLenCenD-ShaDoW//

Click on the lights and wheels to navigate.

The silenced shadow.....

I search for years, but i never find what I seek..
I wonder about the thoughts I have and the dreams I create...

The end result, I am, from the clash of darkness and light,
not defined by purpose nor bound by natural inclinations..

Fighting now for an identity, people scourn and jeer at my hapeless wandering...
Tempted to succumb to the bait of acceptence,
Lured by the sweet scent of easy rest I shall march on to that seemingly impossile goal I have.

Friends I have, but real are they, I'll never be able to tell.

Tales of endless friendship and alliegance of loyalties are always promised, but kept?

I do not want to know.

In times of fun, Games and glory they are there, when I'm needed they are there too..
But if I ever need them, will they still be there??

I don't know.

Visible I am only when required for tasks which dirties the hand or garners no worthy bounty.
Invisible I am at all other times of games and gatherings.

Needed, used and diacarded, that is what I have become for being too nice to insensitive
and stuck up fools.

On days where I'm not needed I always can sense a certain amount of disapproval from my surroundings.

My own mortal mother disdains at my doings.
MY own life I cannot control, My decisions often overwritten by her just by meer fact she's lived longer.

People say they know me well, but when the test comes all fall short and say I am too compicated and unsure of my being.

Mystery shrouds my life from strangers and curious by-standers

A stone walled sheild I seem to have, round a fortress that consumes the true me, never trusting never communicating.

The key that unlocks I keep near me.. No longer dangling to allow anyone in.

The phanthom that engulfed me is now one and true with me. Yet my fears remain and they stab at me with unchecked fury. I have accepted its fate and seem strangely comfortable to being alone and isolated.
But waiting, I am, for the one who shatters this isolating prison.

Death's once horrid stench has become a fragrent scent to me.
I await the day his gleaming blood-stained scythe and gaping, lifeless face visits me.
With reluctant resistance I fight the reapers taunt now, living to find acceptence, searching to quench my quest and lay rest to these haunting thoughts and fleeting memories...

The visible invisibilty I have become..

The Shadow wanders on..

Searching...

[]__^{MemorY Capsule}__[]
Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Yesterday evening was one of the earliest FOs I've ever got! Thanks Lta. Ben! He apparently decided to talk to us, and opened his session with a false tekan session. he was brief and to-the-point. The way I like my military briefings.. Short, sharp and clear. I managed to finish 1 of my 4 assignments due on the 15th yesterday.. Not bad, considering that the place and movement done to it.. All in all, it was a good day for me.. No irritating whining bullies, plently of purposeful work to keep me occupied and an EFO.. plus, thanks to the EFO and Kok Liang, I got down early enuf to catch a rather early 67 and saw X2! My goodness! She's so pretty and feminine looking now! It was fantastic to see her.. Didn chat with her tho.. she had 'company' if you catch my drift.. Anyways, in case all of you are wondering why this post is done so ridiculously early in the morning, its cause im waiting for the poly clinic to open. So, till then ppl!! God bless and forgive the world!!

brakes applied at |6:51 am|

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