\\SiLenCenD-ShaDoW//

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The silenced shadow.....

I search for years, but i never find what I seek..
I wonder about the thoughts I have and the dreams I create...

The end result, I am, from the clash of darkness and light,
not defined by purpose nor bound by natural inclinations..

Fighting now for an identity, people scourn and jeer at my hapeless wandering...
Tempted to succumb to the bait of acceptence,
Lured by the sweet scent of easy rest I shall march on to that seemingly impossile goal I have.

Friends I have, but real are they, I'll never be able to tell.

Tales of endless friendship and alliegance of loyalties are always promised, but kept?

I do not want to know.

In times of fun, Games and glory they are there, when I'm needed they are there too..
But if I ever need them, will they still be there??

I don't know.

Visible I am only when required for tasks which dirties the hand or garners no worthy bounty.
Invisible I am at all other times of games and gatherings.

Needed, used and diacarded, that is what I have become for being too nice to insensitive
and stuck up fools.

On days where I'm not needed I always can sense a certain amount of disapproval from my surroundings.

My own mortal mother disdains at my doings.
MY own life I cannot control, My decisions often overwritten by her just by meer fact she's lived longer.

People say they know me well, but when the test comes all fall short and say I am too compicated and unsure of my being.

Mystery shrouds my life from strangers and curious by-standers

A stone walled sheild I seem to have, round a fortress that consumes the true me, never trusting never communicating.

The key that unlocks I keep near me.. No longer dangling to allow anyone in.

The phanthom that engulfed me is now one and true with me. Yet my fears remain and they stab at me with unchecked fury. I have accepted its fate and seem strangely comfortable to being alone and isolated.
But waiting, I am, for the one who shatters this isolating prison.

Death's once horrid stench has become a fragrent scent to me.
I await the day his gleaming blood-stained scythe and gaping, lifeless face visits me.
With reluctant resistance I fight the reapers taunt now, living to find acceptence, searching to quench my quest and lay rest to these haunting thoughts and fleeting memories...

The visible invisibilty I have become..

The Shadow wanders on..

Searching...

[]__^{MemorY Capsule}__[]
Friday, March 24, 2006

OK.. heres the deal on wads going down soon... in less then a mnths time, tis site will be on hibernation.. i won update and stuff for abt 2 weeks plus.. Going of to waste my time as stated in tis country's law..

Thinking more stuff these days.. I wonder how many ppl treat God like a Shadow too? i'll be the first to admit it. Sadly and more often then not, we usually dun have God in our minds.. We only look to him sincerely in times of need.. Sure, Sure, all you "godly" people out there will say otherwise.. but let me ask you.. does God realli influence ur every tout and action? So now, i try my best to remember tis and then work on truely making God my first priority.

Then those security cams.. Ur using 'security' as an excuse to invade ppls privacy.. why not bug every single home so that you can properly "investigate" crimes and all?? Btw, I ve a realli Bad impression of the cops here.. My impression is that, they get a guy, they insist the guys a crook, if the guy keeps saying hes not the man then they scare him to confession and hey-presto! they "caught" the crook.. Wonder how many ppl they ve done tt to.. Mayb their investigations shld be made transparent too.. Then the public will noe wad goes on behind closed doors.. I ve visited a Drug Rehab camp.. The officers there are so smug abt the control they ve over the inmates. then some stupid idiot shouts at us as if we were dogs, heck his stupid brass juz looks on and seemingly approves the thing.. Then now they show advertisments on he prison and the shit abt rehab... I dun belive them and won eva will.. All govs hide secrets and agendas.. Its only a matter of the scale and type of the secrets. U want proof of this? then tell me... why is it that noone seems to noe anything not so good abt our uppercut ministers? all you got on them is their inspirational stories and all, its as if they neva broke the law before, neva get caught speeding and wadeva it is tt they do... so tell me, why is this so?

brakes applied at |12:27 am|

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